Walking Through the Door Alone

After thousands of readings, I've discovered that the real story often unfolds in the waiting room.

woman walking through an open door

One of the greatest misconceptions about tarot is that it is all about the cards, the descriptions, and divinatory meanings. It isn't. Much of what I've learnt over the past forty years has come from watching people before they get through the door. Who books. Who hesitates. Who waits outside. Who encourages. And who quietly makes sure someone never sits down at all.

Its all an education in human psychology.

After thousands of readings over four decades, the patterns have very little to do with the cards themselves. The cards remain the same. Human are ever-changing

One pattern has always fascinated me.

Single people are far more likely to book a reading than couples. Which is fortunate.

Couples arriving together asking for a “couple’s reading”. I politely decline. It has never interested me as a way of working, and over the years I have come to realise that the request often reveals something deeper.

Very often, it is not really about seeking guidance together.

It is simply about wanting to hear what the other person is told.

People are naturally curious. We all wonder what others think, what they hide, what their future may hold. Yet curiosity can easily become intrusion. A tarot reading should be a private conversation between the reader, the client and, if you like, the symbols themselves.

Trust cannot exist where every thought has to be witnessed by someone else.

As I explained to one woman who entered after resisting her partner’s pressure, “I might say something that is embarrassing to you or your partner. The first topic that came up was the hassle she was getting from an ex, and she had not told her new partner. Later, I was giving her tips on how to deal with her partner, for both their benefits, and once again she was relieved he wasn’t there. Couples always have secrets despite their protestations.

Friends arrive together but agree to come in one at a time. That is ideal. Each person receives an individual reading, leaves with something useful, and often emerges smiling. The next person walks in more relaxed than the last.

It becomes a virtuous circle.

Each person’s positive experience gives confidence to the next.

But there is another character I think of as the blocker.

The blocker has no desire to have a reading themselves. Their role, consciously or unconsciously, is to ensure that nobody else has one either.

Sometimes they joke. Sometimes they mock. Sometimes they invent reasons why it is a waste of money or time. Sometimes they simply create enough discomfort that the other person decides it is easier not to bother. It’s usually a man, puffed up, while his lady looks on at me, silently imploring. The silent one who wants the reading often does not have the confidence to stand up for themselves, so I have to do it for them.

Am I losing customers? Not really. It is always quality over quantity.

That tells you something important.

Its not about tarot; its about relationships.

Recently a young woman, probably around thirty, came to see me in Brighton.

She explained that she had travelled specifically for a reading with me

The previous time she had come to Brighton she was with her boyfriend. She wanted a reading then, but he persuaded her not to have one. The opportunity passed.

Since then, the relationship had ended. This time she came alone.

We had an excellent discussion about creating her future. We explored the subtle ways people can prevent us from listening to ourselves.

Sometimes the obstacle is not dramatic or controlling in an obvious sense.

It can simply be another person’s opinion becoming louder than your own inner voice.

One of the unexpected gifts of tarot is that it creates a rare space where you are allowed to think without interruption. For an hour, someone else’s expectations, assumptions and judgements are left outside the room.

That is surprisingly uncommon.

Many clients tell me afterwards that the reading helped because it gave them permission to trust what they already knew.

The cards did not tell them what to think. The cards gave them space to think.

Perhaps that is why blockers instinctively dislike the process.

Independent reflection changes people.

People who begin making decisions for themselves often become less dependent on the approval of others. That can unsettle relationships built on influence rather than trust.

The young woman left with more than a tarot reading.

She left recognising that coming back to Brighton represented something much larger than finally sitting in front of the cards.

It marked the moment she stopped allowing someone else to decide which conversations she was allowed to have.

Sometimes the most significant step in a person’s journey is not what the Tarot reveals.

It is simply walking through the door alone.

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What has your experience been? Have you ever found someone encouraging your personal growth—or quietly discouraging it? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments. And if you’re ready for a reading free from outside influence, you’re always welcome to book an appointment.